"I know my call despite my faults and despite my growing fears." --Mumford & Sons

I haven't posted on here in almost two years.  Quick recap: I got a 2nd cat (Rosalie), rekindled my relationship with top 40 music, understand how 103 with no humidity can actually be better than 93 with 95% humidity, and have decided this sociology program isn't for me.  Yup, that's right, I'm leaving the program, which means I'm leaving Austin, which is ironic because I first started this blog to keep my New England friends in the loop about my life in Austin.  I'm picking blogging back up in the hopes of keeping my Austin friends in the loop with what's going on in my transition back to Mass.  And to maybe help everyone understand a bit better (including myself) why I'm making this shift.  I'll start at Boston University School of Theology in the fall for my MDiv.  I'll finish my MA in Sociology this summer.

For the record, UT Austin is a FANTASTIC place to go for grad work in sociology.  Austin itself is a fantastic city and UT has some of the most well-established mentoring programs and networking opportunities of any other sociology program I know of.

Some back story to why I'm leaving: when I was a senior at UMass, I knew I was good at sociology and I didn't know what I wanted to do professionally, so I pursued my strengths, which meant grad school.  UT offered me a phenomenal package and I have been able to study aspects of society that truly interest me.  However, where I felt the most "at home" was in my role as a teaching assistant.  Now this is ironic, because in the sociology grad world, TAing is the lowest of the low in the funding option hierarchy.  There are frequently times, though, where I preferred TAing than RAing (I've done both).  So why, you may wonder, am I going for an MDiv and not a masters in education?

Because in the past 2 years I've also realized faith matters to me way more than I thought.  And that, in my opinion, it serves a valuable, even necessary, function in society.  But many teens and young adults that are raised in a faith tradition are typically sheltered within their faith bubble until they go to college.  In college, if their tradition wasn't made relevant in younger years, they see no reason to continue it, nor is there enough of a desire to look into other faiths for this age group typically "church shop".  And finally, from the interviews from my undergrad thesis, a lot of the apathy and aggravation with organized religion comes from the lack of dialogue around issues of sexuality.

All that said, what I hope to do is take 6 years of sociological training in religion, marriage, family, and sexuality and combine 3 years of prep for ministry to teens and young adults about healthy relationships, sex, and sexuality in a way that will probably freak many people out: I want discuss sex and God, work through these issues with them, acknowledging the messiness of human lives and trying to create a safe space for them to question, wrestle, and find clarity.  I won't tell anyone how to live because I don't have all the answers and because I've certainly made mistakes myself, some of which certain faith traditions would say automatically damn me.  For the record, I don't anticipate divinity school to give me the answers.  I somewhat anticipate divinity school to actually give me more questions.

This post minimally scratches the surface of all that's motivating me to change degrees.  (I will be honest and say the idea of being back in Boston was a strong draw as well.)  I'll continue to post through the process (more frequently than when I first started this blog, I promise) because writing everything out helps me articulate my motivations as well.  But this is the start something that at first felt completely off, but not feels completely right.  :)